


And I'm chewing on metallic taste

by stultiloquent



Category: Death Note & Related Fandoms, Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: (gonna just go ahead and tag that first and hope for the best), Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Amane Misa/Rem (minor), Compulsory Heterosexuality, F/F, Femslash February, Femslash February 2021, Infidelity, Internalized Homophobia, Internalized Misogyny, Kanzo Mogi (mentioned), Misogyny, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, References to Canon, and all its terrible things - including:
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:13:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29104620
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stultiloquent/pseuds/stultiloquent
Summary: Every woman can tell when a man starts drifting away - whether that be because he's more married to his job than her, or because of something - or someone - else.But there's no use airing her dirty laundry to people outside the family. Besides, these are things that require a feminine ear to understand. And she had no one.That is, until she reconnected with the other girl by chance.Written for Femslash February:a little SayuxMisa what-if, set after Misa relinquished her memories and starts suspecting Takada’s involved with Light.
Relationships: Amane Misa/Yagami Sayu
Comments: 5
Kudos: 13





	And I'm chewing on metallic taste

**Author's Note:**

  * For [3dnygma](https://archiveofourown.org/users/3dnygma/gifts).



> For canon-divergent purposes, Sayu’s already of age here. Imagine her Coming of Age Ceremony occurs at an earlier date than in canon.
> 
> Actually, I’m not even sure of her canon age at this point. I didn’t rewatch/reread the manga/anime before writing this fic, so please bear with me if there’s any oocness.
> 
> Also FYI, aside from the warnings in tags, you might notice there’s some pretty essentialist views of gender and gendered relations in this fic. That’s not a reflection of my personal politics, just a reflection of the characters’ perspectives (especially Misa’s, who is rather, you know, binary and skewed in her worldview). 
> 
> Shout-out to 3dnygma / [sayu-is-a-sass-queen](https://sayu-is-a-sass-queen.tumblr.com/) for coming in clutch with the quick brainstorm/workshop on Sayu’s character. (Like I said, I didn’t rewatch the series before I started writing, so naturally I deferred to the nearest Sayu stan to jog my memories 😂)
> 
> Title is a lyric from [Curtains](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMV_NNQ0s5c) by BLOXX

Misa still remembers when her day-to-day schedule was packed with appointments from five in the morning to nine - sometimes ten, eleven - at night. She'd wake up looking forward to interviews and photoshoots at the studio, with barely enough time in between to go visit her Light, just enough time to sit in the quaint little patisserie on the street between Todai campus and the investigation headquarters and sip at their sugar-free iced teas while she waited for the elusive smirks and smiles that came her way whenever she did something he liked.

She hasn't had a work appointment in months, since she decided to pursue her marriage as a full-time wife. She hasn't sat down with him for tea in a long time either, let alone seen him smile her way once since this whole stressful Kira investigation took a turn for the worse. He's working extra hours every night.

Or so they say.

She doesn't remember which part of her caught his attention and persuaded him to date her way back when. She was just an up-and-coming model; he was the police chief's son, meant for far greater things than they were both willing to be so bold to admit. Perhaps it was pity, and he's now run out of pity for her. She's not dumb, try as they might pigeonhole her into the category. Every woman can tell when a man starts drifting away - whether that be because he's more married to his job than her, or because of something - or some _one_ \- else.

In days past, she would've simply had a little cry in her own room, the sanctuary where not even her manager would be able to barge in on, and then reassemble herself, perfect makeup and all, to smile for the world. These days, though, she's got a shadow in the form of Kanzo Mogi.

And he's good company. He's been the only willing ear she could rant or babble to for months on end. But there will always be things she can't confess to him about. There's no use airing her dirty laundry to people outside the family. Besides, these are things that require a feminine ear to understand. And she had no one.

That is, until she reconnected with the other girl by chance.

And, well. She's evaded Mogi once, years ago, in a gamble to aid the investigation. She can do it again, if for more selfish reasons this time.

Tonight, she left Mogi stranded at the local mall, waiting for her outside the lingerie shop changing rooms, as she slipped away on furtive, silent feet towards the nearest JR station. She rode the green line all the way to the end, where she knew there'd be a small condo five minutes away from the main exit.

She knocks on the nondescript little wooden door and is promptly let in.

At 19 years old, Sayu Yagami has blossomed into a beautiful young woman in her own right. It's clear in the curve of her mouth and the curl of her eyelashes she's inherited a sliver of the good genes that made Light irresistible in the first place. She might not have the same sweet-talking, cultivated tongue that Light wields to make you feel far worthier than you had any right to believe yourself to be, but she more than makes up for it in other aspects.

And besides, there were far more physical uses for one's tongue. And Sayu's been nothing but a quick learner in the past few weeks.

Misa catches the other girl's eyes straying low when she settles herself onto the couch, short skirt fanning out and doing nothing to hide her panties underneath. She glances up and finds her face flushed, like she's still 15 and hasn't already seen Misa naked several times by now. 

Misa says nothing, content to giggle at Sayu's expense as she bumbles and fumbles for the kitchenette. There's a high, whistling noise - she was likely expecting Misa and had already put the kettle on. Misa grabs a tube of her favourite cherry red lipstick and reapplies it with the reflective surface of her slider phone as her mirror. She's pressing her lips together and checking twice when the screen of her phone lights up with a barrage of incoming texts. 

It's Mogi.

Misa knows better than to unplug her phone entirely. That would just invite more suspicion than is worth. She turns her phone on silent and chucks it to the other side of the couch, just in time to catch Sayu come bearing the nice china tea set Misa gifted her for housewarming earlier that year.

It's cute. She'd make a cute wife. Maybe someday, if and when she decides she wants to settle down with a better man.

For now, Misa casts away all thoughts of the world outside this small, one-room apartment and focuses on Sayu herself. She eyes the way Sayu's luscious dark hair frames her breasts perfectly as she lowers the tray onto the little coffee table between them, the little flicker of tongue as she wets her lips, and she can't help the heat licking its way up from her core to her chest. There's always been a sort of self-consciousness in the way Sayu carried herself, made worse since suffering the terrorist attack - and being in the company of a former supermodel certainly didn't help matters. But Misa is drawn to her - perhaps for that very reason. They couldn't be more different if they tried. But Sayu's absolutely radiant when she gives herself over to pleasure, and Misa can't wait to find out what she'll look like this time beneath her.

Misa doesn't wait for Sayu to rise up - just reaches over and yanks Sayu close. Brown eyes widen in surprise for a millisecond before sliding close as she melts against red lips. There's the sound of teacups crashing against the floor, no doubt staining the carpet with their wetness, and Misa licks into the soft mouth in anticipation. She lets go for a brief moment, if only to tug the younger woman the rest of the way over more gently, then surges back in once the coffee table is out of the way.

Matters progress. They end up tangled on the couch, twin chests panting as hands wander. Misa has to stop herself once Sayu starts grinding down onto her. She lets go of the breast she's mouthing along and lets Sayu take a breather. Her lips are stained red from their messy kiss, and satisfaction curls in Misa's chest at the sight. Like this, trapped beneath Sayu's thighs, the height difference is much more pronounced. If Sayu wanted to take the lead, she could probably pin Misa down and make her scream the walls down until the neighbours get curious. 

But that's not Sayu. Without further prompting on Misa's part, she lowers herself onto the ground, letting herself be guided to kneel against the carpet.

There's another way to make Misa scream. Like she said, Sayu's a fast learner. 

Misa settles slender fingers in dark hair, combing the long strands out of the way as Sayu shifts closer between Misa's open thighs. She pushes back the pleated folds of the skirt, and Misa shifts her hips, helping Sayu slide the articles of clothing out of the way. There's a soft gasp as the panties are peeled off, the soaking wet fabric clinging onto the skin underneath.

Misa can't help but coo then. "Been wanting you since I was on the metro," she murmurs, trailing one finger along the curve of Sayu's jawline.

Sayu's breath hitches, and she looks up at Misa with an even mix of wonder and barely-suppressed hunger. The stars in her eyes have dulled a little over the years; the younger woman now looks at her with something more akin to genuine attraction than a teen's crush on her idol, and it's better like this. Misa has missed spending time with someone who looks at her and sees not just Misa-Misa or Light Yagami's wife, but a real, flesh-and-blood person. And she feels real when she guides Sayu across the last inch to press her trained tongue against her cunt. She feels real when the other woman licks her way inside, pressing up against her sensitive spots and sending tremors all up and down her thighs.

Misa holds the skirt out of the way with one hand so she can see the way Sayu's eyelashes flutter as she concentrates on the task at hand. She's got one hand trapped against her own body and the couch, no doubt creeping beneath her own unfastened jeans to tease at her own clit, and she's beautiful like this too, all notions of doubt and shame banished when she has only Misa and her own pleasure on her mind.

Misa does her best to banish idle thoughts from her own mind as well. Memories of purple locks and a different, learning tongue sometimes crowd her mind - a memory from another lifetime, one that haunts her even though she has no idea where and when it's from. But it's bad form to think about someone else when she's got Sayu on her knees for her. She won't exploit her time the way she's been exploited by others in the past. So she keeps her eyes trained on the dark hair between her thighs this time, and she stares and stares, until the pleasure whites out her mind and frees her of coherent thought.

*

They move to the bedroom at some point. Sayu lets out a slow breath as she leans back against the headboard, studying the way Misa's naked chest rises and falls in a gentle rhythm as she snoozes, tired out from their earlier activities. The last round was particularly vicious; a certain boldness had overcome Sayu, and she'd wrenched three orgasms from the bottle blonde until her thighs were shaking, clamped tight around Sayu's wrist.

In sleep, she looks relaxed for once, none of the pain straining her features as she smiles when she'd rather be grimacing.

Of course, Misa puts up a hell of an act. She hasn't forgotten her acting chops even as a housewife, but it's obvious if you know where to look. And Sayu has had plenty of experience with that pain and loneliness herself. She knows it like the back of her hand, understands what it feels like to be cast aside by someone you considered family, someone who seems to value bigger, loftier goals than the well-being of those closest to him.

She isn't so naive as to blame it all on Kira, either. There's a difference between a heart attack and the death of a relationship. She's seen what the former looks like in the frail hand of her father, so cold and deathly still in a morgue, with none of the strength she'd always associated with him. The latter looks like empty dinner tables, muffled sobs from her parents' bedroom as Mother pretends the investigation hasn't taken their son and brother away from them too.

But there was a conscious choice there. He chose to abandon the family when they needed him most in the aftermath of everything. When Sayu still needed a wheelchair to get around, when Mother was buckling beneath the force of their combined shock and grief - he never spared a second thought for either of them. Sayu had to learn to pick up the pieces by herself. She had to smile for Mother, had to pretend she wasn't in pain, choking on residual fear and panic in the middle of the night at the thought of invisible hands snatching her away from their own home at any moment.

And then to learn he wasn't spending that time by Misa's side either, that he wasn't spending his nights in their marital bed. The absolute shame and fury that coursed through her veins, to hear of Light's whereabouts from Matsuda, who tossed that information out like it was a particularly juicy piece of gossip, and nothing more. 

She didn't need further convincing by the time Misa came to her.

They talked, mostly, for the first few months. Sayu had expected to be head over heels immediately at the prospect of spending some one-on-one time with her former teen idol. But she's not 15 anymore - as Misa's so fond of pointing out. She can't go back to the way things were, when she was younger and more innocent. Instead, they settled into a new sort of familiarity, as two genuine friends talking about anything and everything over tea.

The kissing and the... rest, that came later.

Sayu cards a careful hand through Misa's messy hair. It's hopelessly tangled, another undeniable piece of evidence of the activities that transpired tonight. She drags the duvet over to cover Misa's torso when she shivers a little in her sleep. And it seems almost inevitable in hindsight, that Sayu would fall for this petite blonde in the end. She's magnetic, commanding the attention of everyone that so much as fell in her orbit. She's funny, effortlessly charming even without opening her mouth. And she has a wicked, delectable mouth when she puts her mind to it.

Her brother's a fool to cast her aside for another woman.

And Sayu knows she's no substitute, knows that what she and Misa have just isn't the same. How can it be, when she's just a girl? When what Misa wants is true love, when what she needs is for a _husband_ to come home to her? 

And Sayu knows, as surely as the sun rises in the East, that as soon as Light stops messing around, Misa would go running right back to him. 

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed this fic, consider checking out one of its sources of inspiration also: [One In the Morning](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4713449) by OthilaOdal.
> 
> Or just come talk to me on [Tumblr](https://stvlti.tumblr.com/)!


End file.
